Drunk people make the news for all types of crazy reasons that people tend to frown at, but you just can’t help but laugh at others. The most recent one came from Turkey where a drunk man joined a search party of rescuers to find himself. He didn’t realize that he was the man everyone was looking for until he heard the rescuers shout his name. It is normal for drunk people to do stupid stuff, but sometimes it goes too far and they end up regretting it; or laughing at themselves. It is still wise to drink responsibly and these 10 hilarious stories are living testimony to that.
Unknowingly Bought A Stolen Rock Python
Dwayne Mathews of Coventry, UK, was out drinking with pals when a traveller convinced him that the 10ft python he was carrying would make a great pet. The drunk 29-year-old and his friends agreed with the idea and paid for the python but didn’t know better until the following morning when he found the reptile trying to eat his drunken friend. He secured the python using a blanket but was arrested a few days later trying to pawn it off at a pet store to get some of his money back.
Kidnapped A Penguin
Penguins are amazing birds when you see them in Sea World and you can be easily tempted to carry one home with you but that is never a good idea because you would have to bring the ocean with you as well. Two Welsh tourists visiting Queensland had a little too many to drink before going to Sea World and “rescuing” a penguin called Dirk from the animal enclosure.
They only realized their mistake the following morning when they woke up with a penguin in their living room. They tried to put it in the bathroom but realized that it wouldn’t work. When they chose to release the penguin in a canal in the city. Locals saw them and alerted the authorities which led to the arrest of the two friends.
He sold his car to buy more beer
A man in Rotorua, New Zealand made news in 2017 when he reported his car as stolen only for the police to discover that he had sold it the night before. The unnamed man was drunk but short of money, so he decided to sell his car for NZ$800 which is about $570. He woke up and concluded that it was stolen since he couldn’t remember selling it. The good-hearted buyer was nice enough to return the car for a refund though.
Went Illegal Fishing
Drunk people are mostly arrested for drunken driving and reckless endangerment but this one went one step too far. The man from Massachusetts took his boat for a spin after drinking one too many. He forgot the state limit of eight sea bass per fisherman and hauled a whole 122 sea bass from a canal. He didn’t have any papers with his boat nor his fishing license either so when he was stopped by the environmental police, he had a longer charge sheet than your regular DUI driver.
Bungled A Burglary
You don’t have to remind people that they shouldn’t drink before or during work; even if that work is criminal in nature; right? Jimi Aldington of Paignton, England broke into a lady’s house after drinking alcohol. While looting, he also found some prescription drugs by the victim’s bedside and took them which caused him to fall asleep on a couch next to the items he had stolen. The police had to come in through the very window he had used to break in to arrest him.
Chewed Through a Police Car
Talk about chewing through the leash literally! Well, the back of a police car is not always the most comfortable place for anyone, but chewing your way out is not a viable option unless you are really drunk. The intoxicated woman was arrested in Idaho in 2014 after peppering a couple who called the police on her. When they arrived at the station, the police realized that she had chewed through the upholstery and foam of the backseat leading to additional charges of assault on police property which could attract an additional five years behind bars.
Toured Scandinavia by Taxi
It is always wise to call a taxi if you are intoxicated, but if you can’t punch in the right locations; then you should ask the driver or a friend for help rather than tour half a subcontinent. The culprit in this case drank too much on New Year’s Eve in Copenhagen. When he hailed a taxi, he remembered that he lived in Oslo, Norway so instead of putting in his hotel as location, he put in his house in Oslo. The poor taxi driver had to spend the whole night driving the man through Denmark, Sweden and finally Norway. When he got home, the drunk man refused to pay and the police had to be called for the cab driver to receive his $2,200 bill.
Gave CPR To A Rubber Dingy
It happened in Brittany, France where a 22-year-old man was found by police giving mouth to mouth to a rubber dinghy which he mistook for a person that had collapsed. He had even called emergency services for an ambulance to come and pick up his perceived victim. It was more of pointless kisses and a cosy massage for the lucky dinghy though.
Almost Got Shipped Across The Pacific
Mr Jiang Wu was having a big night in Qingdao, in Shandong China, when he thought he had had enough and decided to go sleep in his room. He mistook a shipping container for his room though. He only woke up when the container was being lifted onto a ship headed for LA. He was lucky because his phone was still working and so started calling everyone he knew. The police had to identify the container he was in from thousands of identical shipping containers in the yard. They finally found him stuck 60ft from the ground just one hour before the ship set sail across the ocean.
Run Over Himself With his Own Car
When police are called on drunk drivers, it is mostly because they have hit someone else, but in this case, karma kind of did the opposite. The police responded to a call to a drunk driver in a parking lot in Rapid City, South Dakota. The driver tried to run away from the police but he couldn’t outrun the police car, so he decided to take off on foot. He forgot to engage the brakes while jumping out of his car though, so as he fell down, the rear tires of his own car ran over his legs. He ended up needing a hospital visit before his trip to jail.